Category: Messy Feelings
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Hi! Can I say something petty?
Every once in a while I just need to say something awful or stupid or exciting or just a jumbled mass of words, paragraphs, images, monologues, or petty grievances. Sometimes the content just a series of successive events that I can’t quite close out. And other times, maybe something gets…
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A long drive to anywhere but here
I have been in this car for a year. Just me, chapped hands clasped tight in the last rays of the setting sun. Here in the desert. Here near the ocean. Here the mountains and caverns. He said my name as if it were the last time. We drove to the caves…
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How to grieve when you are bad at it – part 1
TW: death of a grandmother and pet I was acutely aware that I didn’t understand death. I understood the basics, but I didn’t understand the emotions or the experience. Previous deaths I have experienced were when I was too young or too distanced to be heavily impacted. But I knew…
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How to make friends when you’re bad at leaving the house…
Sometimes I get frustrated at being lonely…and then I realize I haven’t contacted anyone or made plans in weeks. Maybe I’ll do it tomorrow.
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Radar graphs to understand loneliness and discontent – part 2
This is a continuation from part 1. I’ve broken out this section to talk separately about when I compare myself to different socialization models, and why that can induce false loneliness. Each of the “fights” below indicate logical fallacies that have led me to outsized loneliness and discontent. Me vs.…
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Radar graphs to understand loneliness and discontent – part 1
A quick note on how this is related to friendship. I’ve been thinking of loneliness and discontent as triggers that induce people to contact existing friends and to try new strategies to make friends. The quality of loneliness/discontent and the intensity of the feeling can undermine these efforts if not…
The Friend Manual: How to make friends when you're bad at it 